ummmm . . . okay?

Seen at Gimme Patience. For a bookworm, this is, like, the coolest Blog Quiz ever! I was dying to know which literary classic I would be.

Just goes to show ya . . . curiosity killed the cat.

I’ve never read Lolita. I guess now I will have to.

You’re Lolita!

by Vladimir Nabokov

Considered by most to be depraved and immoral, you are obsessed with
sex. What really tantalizes you is that which deviates from societal standards in every
way, though you admit that this probably isn’t the best and you’re not sure what causes
this desire. Nonetheless, you’ve done some pretty nefarious things in your life, and
probably gotten caught for them. The names have been changed, but the problems are real.
Please stay away from children.

Take the Book Quiz
at the Blue Pyramid.

PostSecret

I want this PostSecret book rilly, rilly bad and I can’t bring myself to buy it. And I don’t know why.

That’s my secret. 😉

respectful exploration

Earlier this week, I read Talk Before Sleep by Elizabeth Berg. I read the book years ago and have thought of it often. I couldn’t remember the title or the author of the book. What I remembered was the feeling I had from reading the book. I love it when a book affects me that way. I think writers have such an enviable power in that they can so easily manipulate emotions. I almost always prefer books to movies because seeing an actor portray a scene on screen has never been as powerful as the same scene portrayed in my mind as I read. The reason is, when the story plays out in my mind, the characters and situations are always familiar to me because, naturally, I draw on my own experiences and emotions when weaving together a mental image. It’s comforting, somehow.

Talk Before Sleep is a story of two women who are best friends. Ann and Ruth share an enviable and solid bond. They understand each other. They love each other. They are completely and unabashedly devoted to one another. They tenderly care for one another, especially when Ruth is diagnosed with terminal cancer. The book’s focus is, what would you say if you knew you didn’t have time on your side?

One lesson I took away from the book, whether or not the author meant it, is that I can soften myself and be unapologetically affectionate with the people I love and it doesn’t make me any the weaker. In fact, it makes me stronger.

Some believe emotional armor involves building walls around the heart and holding those who try to get close to us at arm’s length. I have come to understand that, for me, emotional armor involves pulling those I love close to me and disclosing my feelings. After all, the point of wearing armor is to stay safe, is it not? What could possibly be any safer than honesty and communication in a loving and respectful friendship? Trusting others has a curious effect; they tend to value it so much that they would take a bullet rather than betray the trust you have willingly placed in their hands.

This quote seemed especially powerful to me:

. . . it wasn’t something that diminished me, but rather made me fuller, and richer. I saw that every person is a multifaceted and complex being, worthy of respectful exploration and discovery; that this longing we can’t name and try to cure with relationships might only be us, wanting to know all of our own selves.

I felt that a great truth had been illuminated for me. I felt like I could finally realize and understand the value of the many friends who’ve come through my life. I have a tendency to form very close friendships rather than casual acquaintances. I have childhood friends and friends who were teachers when I was in junior high and high school. I have friends from Nursing school and friends from work. I have friends who are seventy years old and friends who are twenty years old and countless friends whose ages fall somewhere in the middle. I have friends that I see every day and friends that I see once a year. Friends made in “real-life” and friends met via the Internet. All of them are dear to me and all of them have taught me more about myself.

I like the term “respectful exploration”. I like it because it takes into account that we all have our handicaps, our scars, and our boundaries that dictate how emotionally involved we are willing to become in any relationship. But I have learned that being respectful of those same boundaries can eventually result in the the deepest form of trust. Respect breeds respect. Gentle, respectful exploration in a relationship can yield such beautiful results.

Myself, I am thankful for the friends I’ve made in my life and so glad that, although they were respectful of my personal boundaries, they were also wise enough to gently push some of those boundaries until they were more like lines in the sand than concrete walls. In retrospect, I realize that every time I have held a friend at arm’s length or built a wall to keep myself safe, I have denied myself the opportunity to know myself better.

And that’s a shame. I happen to like me.

My New Look

Well, do you like my new look? Laura at Ciao! My Bella! hooked me up! I personally am just so pleased with the look!

I spent six hours today at the spa getting the Cleopatra for a Day treatment that my husband bought for me for my 30th birthday. I must say it was lovely for the most part. The massage and facial were ni-i-ice. It was all niice to be thruthful. However, let me share with you one of my pet peeves. I can’t stand it when professionals who are supposed to be delivering a relaxing treatment will NOT STOP TALKING! The lady who did my manicure and pedicure talked continually about her troubled marriage. The only time she changed the subject was when she told me not to get a pedicure at another salon because they are not sanitary. She only changed the subject because I mentioned how much better I like getting a pedicure when I get to sit in that big, warm massage chair. It offended her, I think. Other than the chatty pedicurist, the experience was wonderful. I literally spent 3 1/2 hours being pampered and massaged while lying on a soft and warm massage table. My life’s ambition is to have enough money to do that whenever I feel like it! Well, that may not be my primary life’s ambition, but still . . .

Then, I had a perfect end to a nice day—we had our book club meeting tonight. We discussed Wicked:The Life and Times of the Wicked Witch of the West and I got to choose our new selection since I was the hostess! I chose The Good Earth by Pearl S. Buck. It has been mentioned at book club before that I always choose a book I have already read while the other members tend to choose books they want to read but haven’t yet. I think I choose books I have already read because they are like old friends to me. I always want to share the books for which I have a particular fondness. We usually try to theme refreshments after the book in some small way. Between being at the spa all day and knowing that I still had to pick up the house before our meeting, I did not theme the refreshments. Plus, I could not quite figure out how to theme them after Wicked. My friend, Rhonda, said I should have served only green food since the Wicked Witch was green. She has a brain for finding themes. I just do not.

I got lots of comments on my sleepwalking post. I was touched and amused by the many comments expressing concern for poor little me living with such a horrible condition 🙂 Let me assure you that it is not that bad. I almost never sleepwalk or have night terrors anymore unless we are sleeping away from home. It has gotten so much better since I had children. I think I sleep lighter and thus avoid the night terrors. I have actually always felt a little bit proud of my sleepwalking tendencies. I mean, it guarantees that I will always have lively stories to tell, right?

You know you are addicted to Harry Potter when . . .

Honestly, there are several things on this list that I have never done. However, I am truly excited about Harry Potter and Half-Blood Prince and will be standing in line at midnight Friday night to buy it:-)

I will be out of town this weekend at my husband’s high school reunion. I probably will not post because my mother still has dial-up at her house and I am too impatient to put up with it! I hope you all have a great weekend! I can’t wait to talk to some of you who are as anxious to read the Harry Potter book as I am ! I know Xtessa and Miss Zoot will especially have something to say about it!

You know you are addicted to Harry Potter when . . .

You make a wand and try to use it.

You call your least favorite teacher Snape.

You call your favorite teacher Dumbledore.

You wear robes to school or work.

You make “floo powder”, get in the fire, and try to go to your friends’ house.

You have read all the books more than four times.

You’ve been bookstore at midnight to get the latest Harry Potter book before all your friends.

… And then you stayed up all night wearing it.

You’ve worn a Harry Potter costume in public.

You have a crush on one of the Harry Potter characters.

You’ve gotten at least one of your friends addicted to Harry Potter.

You actually caught the “Wand Order” mistake before you heard/read about it.

You are upset at the New York Times for creating a seperate childrens best seller list because of the Harry Potter books.

Using clues in the book, you have attempted to find the exact geographical location of Hogwarts.

You have constructed a timeline of events in the Harry Potter books.

You have attempted to figure out the exact ages of all the Weasley children?

You have spent time contemplating which main characters will die by the time the series is over.

You’ve been to see all the Harry Potter movies on opening night. (Bonus points for standing in line in costume!)

You’ve read Harry Potter fanfic.

You’ve written Harry Potter fanfic.

You run a Harry Potter fansite.

You visit The Leaky Cauldron daily.

You’ve met other Harry Potter fans from online in real life.

You’ve participated in a Harry Potter RPG.

You’ve dreamed about Harry Potter.

You have a Harry Potter poster on your wall.

Each Halloween, there’s no question what you’ll dress up as…!

You’ve spent time doing a timeline to see if you would have been old enough to date a certain character when you were in high school.

You’ve vacationed to London, simply to search for the Leaky Cauldron.

You own a black lab named Sirius Black.

You’ve knitted a Weasley sweater or Harry Potter scarf.

You actually get these jokes and pass them on to other friends who are addicted to Harry Potter.

Review of The World According To Garp

At first, I thought The World According to Garp was about lust. I was right. Then I thought Garp was about the consequences of lust. I was right. Then, I thought Garp was about death. It was. Then, I thought it was about love. It was. Ultimately, I discovered that Garp was about life . . . and that’s all. I think Garp illustrated that life is the ultimate punishment and reward for all of our decisions. The consequence for every action we perform is life itself. We all have to live with our decisions whether they be good or bad. Jenny Fields had to live with the consequence of her decision to have a baby without a father. In that instance, she was able to be a mother and thoroughly enjoy the consequences of her decision. When Helen Holm made the decision to have an affair, she had to live with disatrous results. Garp’s decision to engage in a war with the Ellen Jamesians resulted in the loss of his life at an early age. Jenny Field’s decision to publish a controversial book led to mixed consequences for her. She was able to help many broken women, but later paid with her life.

I must say that I had trouble putting this book down. I was mesemerized by Irving’s storytelling. Even the stories within the story (Garp’s writing) held me spellbound. I loved “The Pension Grillparzer.” I was at times disgusted with myself for reading such a twisted story, but it all seemed so real. I loved how human Garp’s character was. I loved the way Irving tied so many events together with so little effort. Nothing about the story seemed forced. I cried and had to put the book down for the night when little Walt was killed. I cried for Duncan and Helen when Garp was killed. I shuddered along with Jenny Fields when Alice asked Garp to speak despite his broken jaw and he said, “Arp!”

One thing I must say is that I never understood the spouse-swapping part of the book. And, despite the tragedy of the car accident, I had to laugh that poor Michael Milton’s penis got bitten off! If you have read the book, tell me if that just seemed like a brilliant detail on the part of John Irving.

I loved and hated this book. And, to tell the truth, I will probably read it over and over again. It was so REAL.

Books I am Reading

Here is a list of books I have stacked on my shelf to read–not on a list–actually stacked up waiting to be read!

Wicked: The Life and Times of the Wicked Witch of the West by Gregory Maguire

I actually read this one on the plane and by the pool on my vacation this past week. It was a very different book. If you are looking for something different, read this one.

The World According to Garp by John Irving
I am reading this one right now. It was a gift from a friend.

A Prayer for Owen Meany by John Irving
Also a gift from a friend

The Good Earth by Pearl S. Buck
I plan on selecting this book for my book club when my turn comes up.

The Awakening and Selected Short Fiction by Kate Chopin

Sense and Sensibility by Jane Austen

Emma by Jane Austen
I really like the way Jane Austen writes.

Sam’s Letters to Jennifer by James Patterson
This one was recommended and loaned to me by a friend

AND

I plan to take a day or two off from living when Harry Potter and the Half-Blood Prince comes out on July 16th. Don’t expect me to do anything but read on that weekend, people!

Book Club Blather

I am a member of a book club. I have a group of friends and we meet once a month to discuss a book we have all read and to select a new book. There are three of us who attend regularly. It is always a pleasant surprise if our other members attend.

The last book discussed at our book club meeting was “A Connecticut Yankee in King Arthur’s Court” by Mark Twain. I really enjoyed the book. I didn’t quite finish it because we were busy with Little League baseball every night for a couple of months. Plus, I have been nursing a tension headache for about 5 days now and it is painful to read. However, I did read the book years and years ago. It is a brilliant social and political satire. I would love to sit down and have a conversation with Mark Twain.

Our new book selection is “Wicked: The Life and Times of the Wicked Witch of the West” by Gregory Maguire. I have read the first few pages and can’t wait to curl up and finish it.

Book Club is such a fun thing to do. Of course we all enjoy the books, but it is a great reason to converse with other adults, eat yummy food, and drink cocktails. Tonight, our hostess tried to adhere to a medieval-type theme keeping with the whole “King Arthur” subject. For hor d’oeuvres, she served pickled herring, goat cheese, fruit, almonds, walnuts, and dark bread with honey butter. For the main course, she cooked a bird pie and told us that we would be eating a pigeon pie if we were truly keeping with the medieval theme, but she had mercy on us and substituted chicken instead. We also had some sort of sauteed dish comprised of fennel, saffron, and onions. To drink, we had our choice of cider, water, wine, or hard cider. For dessert, we had berries cooked in their own juice and sweetened with honey with cream poured over the top. After our dessert, we had warm, spiced mead. I think if we had used wine, it would have been called mulled wine? I must say, the spiced mead was delicious. Kind of like wassail with a kick! Our host really outdid herself. It was a lovely evening. Had we not had such a feast, it still would have been lovely. I truly enjoy meeting with these exceptional women every month and discussing literature. If I had a mother ship, it would look much like a Barnes and Noble storefront, I think.

Salty Alcohol

We had our monthly book club meeting tonight at Brenda’s. For refreshments we had salty alcohol (nachos and margaritas) and brownies. Both refreshments were woven into important parts of the book. I can honestly say that I ate/drank all of the above in moderation.We discussed The Art of Mending. There was not a whole lot of discussion because all of us understood the book perfectly. We all know that siblings have very different experiences and memories of growing up despite living in the same house with the same people. I think it was easy to feel sorry for Caroline but it was also easy to understand her. It was Brenda’s turn to choose a book and she chose A Connecticut Yankee in King Arthur’s Court which is great for me because I love Arthurian Legend and already read the book years ago. Since the book was pretty easy to dissect, we ended up talking about a mllion other things and ended up recommending Cynthia Heimel’s books to our friend Rhonda. The first one is called, “Sex Tips for Girls,” the second is called “If you can’t live without me, why aren’t you dead yet?” and the third is called, “Get Your Tongue Out Of My Mouth, I Am Kissing You Goodbye.” They are HYSTERICAL. They have sections in them called “Zen and the Art of Diaphragm Insertion”, “Men, Boys, and Haidressers,” “How to Flirt”, etc. I highly recommend them for fun ONLY! If you took most of her “advice” you would end up dead or with VD or BOTH!

Can you tell I am having fun now that I know how to add hyperlinks to my posts?

Things I did today

Things I did for others today:
1. I stayed home for Crash and played about a zillion games of UNO Attack
2. I helped Crash plant his petunias
3. I helped Bump make a rocket
4. I went to dinner with Brad without the kids despite really wanting to stay home and read my book.

Things I did for myself today:
1. I went back to bed after sending Brad and Bump off to school and work
2. I read 3 chapters of my book

Things I did to make the world prettier:
1. Planted herbs, flowers and rosebushes
2. Watered my trees
3. Deadheaded my rosebushes—until I saw two huge, hairy, creepy spiders on them and FREAKED out! I hate hairy spiders!
4. Posted pictures of my beautiful children to my blog 🙂

Brad and I were supposed to go to dinner with this salesman tonight. Well, the salesman’s plane was full so he called us and told us to go eat at this steakhouse without him and that he had already called and told them he was paying. We got to the steakhouse and it was some hole-in-the-wall mom and pop place. We were a little afraid, but decided to brave it. Turns out it was like a K-Bob’s only not as good—if you can imagine that. So, it was pretty nasty but at least we got to eat dinner together and have adult conversation without any interruptions.

Now we are watching Smallville–a guilty pleasure. It is kind of a teeny bopper show, but we love Superman and this is the story of Superman’s teenage years. Lex Luther is still a good guy in this series.

I am reading a book called “A Voice in the Wind.” It is a historical Christian novel that my best friend gave me to read. I like it, but it is set in Ancient Rome when there were gladiators who fought to the death in the arena and captives–especially Christians–were murdered or killed by wild animals while Roman citizens watched and cheered. I have no stomach for violence. I do not watch violent movies and I am having a hard time reading this book. I am about halfway through it though and it is very interesting.

Apparently, our dress code committee at work has decided that from Easter until September we no longer have to wear pantyhose or socks if we do not want to. What a relief–pantyhose make my butt itch and I am certain they are capable of causing crotch-rot. Not very couth–I know. Spare me your shocked outbursts.

Here is one of my favorite parts of The Art of Mending. The author is talking about gingko biloba and how she and some other ladies she knows take it to improve their memory.

“A friend of mine had recently said about gingko biloba, “I think whatever-that-stuff-is-called works great. I just keep forgetting to take it.” Another friend told me about a time she’d answered her cell phone and told her girlfriend, who was the caller, that she was in the parking lot of ger doctor’s office, getting ready to go in for an appointment, but she was early; she had some time to talk. They chatted for a while and then the woman happened to look down into her purse at the empty carrier for her cell phone. She told her friend, “Dammit, I lost my cell phone.” Wait. It gets worse. The friend says, “Well, let’s retrace your steps.”

I laughed so hard at that passage. I could just see Angie and I doing that. I could see Brenda doing it, but she would blame it on Alzheimer’s instead of just admitting she had a blonde moment.